War years with her sister in the Netherlands: no hunger, but cold. Appearances with the Concertgebouw Orchestra, sonata recitals, concert tours to earn a living. An encounter with Rabindranath Tagore and a circle of quiet people change her view of life.
In Holland we no longer suffered from hunger, but we certainly froze. Most families, with their large houses and villas, lived primarily in the bathroom or the children’s room to save heating. My mother’s sister had also married a Dutchman , formerly the editor‑in‑chief of the well‑known Handelsblad , and they lived with their large family (11 children) near us. The eldest son, Charles Boissevain , was a great lover of the arts and a close friend of Gustav Mahler and Willem Mengelberg . We became friends, and I often later had occasion to meet with him.
Without his intervention — since that was not customary in Holland — I twice had the opportunity, during those years, to perform with the Concertgebouw Orchestra in Amsterdam . The first time I played the Symphonie Espagnole , with which I again had great success, and the second time the Scottish Fantasy . I also gave a number of sonata recitals with an excellent pianist, Jeanette Valen . Since no money could be sent from Austria, I had to earn my living, and therefore travelled around the country to perform, while Teta took care of the children. As conditions in Vienna were still very poor in 1919, and we had no apartment, we had to be patient and remain in Holland longer.
The reader of these recollections will ask: “Where, then, lies the fatefulness in these years?” I arrived in Holland in a deep depression. I could not imagine that life could ever become worth living again. Then I became aware of a group of people who approached life in an entirely different way, and from whom I learned many things that enabled me to meet fate anew. They were not all famous; they did not strive for success or honors, but they were great human beings, rising high above average humanity, and silently dedicating their lives to the welfare of mankind.
Through my cousin Mary van Eeghen , I also came to know Rabindranath Tagore , who lived for several months on her beautiful estate by the Zürich Lake . My cousin later donated this estate to an organization that built a Montessori school , a church, lecture halls, and more. One evening with Tagore remains vivid in my memory. I played Bach and Beethoven for him — but the music did not please his Indian ears — and then he sang his own songs.
In summary, I would say that I changed my entire outlook on life, and from then on saw the world with joyful eyes.
In the autumn of 1920 we returned, together with Teta and the children, to Vienna .
From “Mein Musikleben” by Mary Dickenson-Auner, 3 October 1963. The text follows the manuscript; the chapter numbering is that of the original.